5 Lies I Believed When My Husband Was Watching Porn by April Mabrey



Dear Christian woman,
If you husband is demanding sex in pornographic ways and criticizing or denigrating you when you won't do things that you know are clearly against God's view of intimacy between a man and woman, then take the trouble to find out what kind of man you married. There are men, who with counsel and long term help submit to God and leave pornography behind. If they are truly submitted to God their view of intimacy becomes godly. They are eager to help other men overcome their terribly dark sin.

However there is a man who will lie about their use of pornography and berate you if discovered, constantly make innuendo about your lack of sexuality, and treat you badly until they get what they want. Even then they are not satisfied because they only want more. This is not the picture of man submitted to God nor does he value his spouse's needs and desires. Remember scripture not only calls for the woman to be submissive but for the man to be submissive to God first and his wife...submission one to another is the rule! 

MEN! Submit is a verb. Submitting is a voluntary action. That means it is something we ourselves do. It’s not something we make someone else do. Just as we can’t force another person to love us, we can’t force someone to submit to us either. Of course we can make that person do what we want. But then that’s not true submission.

Submission is a choice we make. It’s something each one of us must decide to do. And this decision happens first in the heart. If we don’t decide in our hearts that we are going to willingly submit to whomever it is we need to be submitted to, then we are not truly submitting. That makes it difficult, if not impossible, for the person we want to submit to us.

This may be shocking news to you, but an overwhelming majority of wives in my survey said they want to submit to their husbands. They want their husbands to be the "head of the home(spiritual leader)", and they have no desire to usurp that God-given position of leadership. They know what the Bible says on the subject, and discerning wives want to do what God wants because they understand that God’s ways work best.

However, severe problems often arise in this area because a wife is afraid to submit to her husband for two reasons:
Reason #1: Her husband thinks submission is only a noun, and he uses it as a weapon.
Reason #2:
 Her husband has himself not made the choice in his heart to be fully submitted to God. How can she respect him if he will not submit to authority?

CHECK OUT MY BLOGS ON NARCISSISM! This man or woman is an entirely different matter and must be avoided! 
See you next blog,
Ted



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