WHY DOESN"T SHE LEAVE? When Fear Holds You Hostage To Your ABUSER


WHY DOESN'T SHE LEAVE-THOSE WHO ARE AWARE OF THE ABUSIVE SPOUSE'S BEHAVIOR WONDER? WHAT IS HOLDING HER CAPTIVE?


SIMPLE ANSWER: FEAR!

2 Timothy 1:7 (KJV) ~ For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.


Notice how strongly God emphasizes what He has not given you, and then He gives three precious, powerful, promises telling you what He has given you. Fear will paralyze you; it will grip you and ensnare you. Many people suffer from the snare of fear; it can devour their very life. Like someone caught in a trap, they cannot go forward, nor go back; they are held captive and can only focus on what is right in front of them. They lose their vision for the future because they are bound by fear.


The fear of their ABUSER,
The fear of a child going astray because of divorce from their ABUSER,
The fear of failing in marriage THEY SWORE A COVENANT TO,
The fear of being killed by their ABUSER,
The fear of losing a loved one because they went against the church's teaching,
The fear of displeasing God because you were taught He will punish you for leaving,
The fear of an uncertain future without their dependency on their ABUSER,
The fear of being in lack because the ABUSER controls ALL the money,

The fear of what the ABUSER will do in court to attempt take their children or make the divorce very difficult,
THE FEAR OF BEING ALONE, OSTRACIZED BY FRIENDS, FAMILY, AND CHURCH.



This is a hard-hitting text which deals with the “hot potato” subject of fear. Fear has to do with punishment, yet in Christ Jesus you find no condemnation nor rejection, but love and acceptance. 



The Christian woman may feel she is trapped in a harmful relationship. Things are changing quickly in denominational churches today as it is now commonly known that ABUSE is extremely dangerous to mental, emotional, spiritual and/or physical health! Biblical and Non-biblical counselors are being trained in the dangers of ABUSE to the victims and responding with HELP!


WHO AM I IN CHRIST? WHERE DO I STAND WITH GOD?


Read Romans 8:1-4
Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you[a] free from the law of sin and death.For what the law was powerless to do because it was weakened by the flesh,[b] God did by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh to be a sin offering.[c] And so he condemned sin in the flesh, in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fully met in us, who do not live according to the flesh but according to the Spirit.


Romans 8:28-39

28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who[i] have been called according to his purpose. 29 For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. 30 And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified;those he justified, he also glorified.

FEAR ONLY EXISTS FOR ONE PURPOSE: TO BE CONQUERED-YOU CAN!!

More Than Conquerors

31 What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? 32 He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? 33 Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. 34 Who then is the one who condemns? No one. Christ Jesus who died —more than that, who was raised to life —is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. 35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? 36 As it is written:
“For your sake we face death all day long;
    we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.”[j]
37 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38 For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,[k] neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Read Ephesians1:1-14

Paul, an apostle of Christ Jesus by the will of God, To God’s holy people in Ephesus,[a] the faithful in Christ Jesus:


Grace and peace to you from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.

Praise for Spiritual Blessings in Christ

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ. For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love he[b]predestined us for adoption to sonship[c] through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will— to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves.In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace that he lavished on us. With all wisdom and understanding, he[d] made known to us the mystery of his will according to his good pleasure, which he purposed in Christ, 10 to be put into effect when the times reach their fulfillment —to bring unity to all things in heaven and on earth under Christ.
11 In him we were also chosen,[e] having been predestinedaccording to the plan of him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will, 12 in order that we, who were the first to put our hope in Christ, might be for the praise of his glory. 13 And you also were included in Christ when you heard the message of truth, the gospel of your salvation. When you believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, 14 who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession—to the praise of his glory.



Don't be afraid to leave the things behind that hinder your walk with God and your teaching of faith to your children by living your own life out for God. God entitles each of us to be able to walk before Him without someone making us doubt ourselves. Your ABUSER'S unrepentant sins hold you and your children captive! 
GET HELP AND GET OUT!

I would like to introduce pastor Jeff Crippen, a pastor who ministers to the abused in the correct way with truthful advice: 


IF YOU ARE A CHRISTIAN AND HAVE TROUBLE RECONCILING LEAVING-ABUSE IS A FORM OF MURDER-SEE WHY IN HIS BLOG AND AUDIOS

http://cryingoutforjustice.wordpress.com/2012/01/10/sermon-dealing-with-the-abuser-by-pastor-jeff-crippen/


http://www.sermonaudio.com/search.asp?keyword=domestic%20violence


God has not given you a spirit of fear, but of power, love and sound mind. You are given power to overcome any and all situations, love which combats fear and casts all fear away, for God’s perfect love drives out fear. And then, a sound mind, one which is focused on the promises of God, on the positive and powerful, liberating truth of God’s word, for your mind to be filled with His prevailing word which brings you His perfect peace. Your ABUSER wants you and others to think you are unstable so that you will remain under his control! 


YOU MAY FIND YOU HAVE BECOME DEPENDENT UPON YOUR ABUSER IF YOU HAVE BEEN TOGETHER FOR A LENGTHY PERIOD OF TIME:
Read again Out Of The Fog  Subject: Dependent Personality Disorder
http://outofthefog.net/Disorders/DPD.html 


Read again my prior blogs on this subject. In every case the ABUSER wants you to think YOU ARE THE PROBLEM. They will do anything to make you believe YOU ARE THE UNSTABLE ONE IN THE RELATIONSHIP!


His power, His love and His soundness of mind will bring YOU to a place where no snare of the enemy will trap you, because your mind is fully focused on His word. The Bible says in Isaiah 59:19 (KJV), “When the enemy shall come in like a flood, the Spirit of the LORD shall lift up a standard against him.” 


SEEK HELP FROM A QUALIFIED COUNSELOR WHO RECOGNIZES PERSONALITY DISORDERS IN THE OFFENDING SPOUSE. HAVE THEM DIRECT YOU TO SOURCES OF HELP AND ESCAPE!!



See you next blog.
Ted









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